Back in 2018, after I didn’t get pupillage (after three years of applying), I was so lost. [For anyone who does not know, pupillage is 12 months of training to qualify as a barrister.]
I am not from the UK, so my student visa was expiring (thankfully graduates now have two years after university to apply for jobs). I did not have the financial means or even a place to stay back to keep applying for jobs. To be honest, I did not even know how I could get a paralegal job or any job as an international student - some recruitment firms just told me to not bother applying.
I was such a control freak - I always knew what I wanted, made a plan on how to achieve it and then I would put my 100% in order to do so. But for the first time, everything I did just did not work out. I had to let go knowing that qualifying in the UK was something I had worked towards since I was 13.
But I was so determined to come back to London and build my career. I really prayed for it.
Fast forward to four years later, I am so grateful my initial plans did not work out. It turns out sometimes you can want something so bad, but it just is not for you. I have had two really important realisations since then:
Clearly becoming a solicitor was my true calling and it only took me 20 rejections and eight months of feeling lost to realise it.
I literally cannot believe I worked and lived in London this year, and I find it even more baffling trying to believe it was all because of my own hard work over the years. But after living the fast paced London dream I used to pray for, I can tell you with assurance that it just was not for me. And it’s funny because in 2018 I loved it. This just goes to show that our personalities and priorities keep changing over the years and we learn what matters most to us as we get older. For example, I never thought I would be someone who gets affected by weather so much, but it really got to me this year.
I am looking so forward to a new beginning in Dubai, warmer weather and working in a department I waited to do since I landed my Training Contract in 2019 (litigation and arbitration).